During lunch at work last week – Funny

When I got home, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight. He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go.

It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a garbage dump! I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other leg, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on releasing atomic bombs like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable! Eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, so I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table, with their hands to their noses.

Related Posts

How a Tiny Hole in a Safety Pin Solves a Big Everyday Problem

A safety pin looks like one of the simplest tools around—small, inexpensive, and easy to ignore. Most people see it as a quick fix for loose fabric…

How a Simple Thimble Became One of Sewing’s Most Timeless Tools

At first glance, a thimble looks like a modest accessory, but its role in hand sewing is surprisingly important. Designed to protect fingers from repeated needle pressure,…

How I Turned a Gender Reveal Into a Moment of Truth

I never imagined my first pregnancy would lead to the most unforgettable gathering our quiet Maryland neighborhood had ever seen. At 32 and expecting my first child,…

How to Recognize Subtle Shifts in a Relationship Before They Grow

Sometimes a relationship doesn’t change with a bang, but with a quiet sense that something feels off. There’s no single argument or dramatic moment—just a growing awareness…

How a Troubled Childhood Became Part of One of America’s Darkest Crime Stories

At first glance, there was nothing remarkable about the boy who would later shock the nation. With dark eyes, a reserved expression, and a tendency to keep…

How a Singular Voice Turned Teenage Feeling Into Timeless Music

The news settled in quietly, but its weight was unmistakable. A voice that once captured the urgency and vulnerability of youth has gone still, leaving behind a…