Best divorce letter ever!

Love often comes with the expectation of permanence, but life doesn’t always unfold as we envision, leading to separations. In one instance, a husband believed that ending his marriage through a heartfelt letter would minimize the pain. Little did he know, his decision would trigger an unexpected and humorous response from his clever wife, imparting a valuable lesson. This exchange of letters showcases the unpredictability of relationships and how humor can arise even in challenging moments.

Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband, Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work. I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!

Related Posts

Gwen Stefani Shares a Personal Message—and Fans Rally Behind Her

Gwen Stefani has long been celebrated for her creativity, individuality, and unmistakable influence on both music and fashion. From her groundbreaking years with No Doubt to her…

Inside the Quiet, Carefully Guided Childhood of Barron Trump

Barron William Trump, born on March 20, 2006, in Manhattan, grew up as the only child of Donald and Melania Trump. Throughout his childhood, Melania took an…

Elizabeth Franz: Honoring the Life of a Tony-Winning American Icon

The theater world is pausing to celebrate the life and legacy of Elizabeth Franz, the Tony Award–winning actress whose six-decade career helped shape American stage and screen….

Behind the Mockery: How Compassion Rewrote Her Story

The internet can take an ordinary moment and magnify it beyond recognition, and for one young woman, a single unflattering photo became the spark for an unexpected…

What Your Favorite Color Quietly Reveals About You

A favorite color rarely feels like a random choice; it often reflects something quieter and more personal—an instinctive pull toward a feeling, a memory, or a sense…

A Small Hand Stretch That Brings Big Relief

We rely on our hands far more than we acknowledge—typing, texting, steering, lifting, scrolling, and managing countless small tasks from morning until night. All that constant movement…