70-year-old widow posts newspaper advert looking for new husband, only for it to go viral

Getting back into the dating world can be strange, and intimidating, especially if it’s been a long time since you were last single. Of course, the most important lesson to remember is that it’s crucial you stay open to others and don’t judge anyone too quickly.

It was with that in mind that I decided to share a funny story I recently came across online. It involves a 70-year-old widow, a newspaper advert, and a search for a new husband.

She was at home one day when her doorbell suddenly rang … only, she couldn’t possibly have predicted who would be on the other side.

Read the full hilarious joke below — and make sure you stick with it until the punchline.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again…

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you — you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Why not help cheer a friend up? Share this joke and help give someone a good laugh!

Related Posts

Remembering a Beloved Actress: A Life of Talent, Warmth, and Lasting Impact

A beloved actress known for her heartfelt performances and unmistakable screen presence has passed away at age 60 after being struck by a vehicle in New York…

Senate Confirms Anne-Leigh Gaylord Moe as Federal Judge in Florida

The U.S. Senate has confirmed Anne-Leigh Gaylord Moe as a U.S. District Judge for the Middle District of Florida, advancing President Donald Trump’s efforts to shape the…

A Hollywood Daughter Breaks Her Silence: A Rare Glimpse Into Life Behind the Spotlight

In a surprising and heartfelt moment, the daughter of a globally recognized Hollywood star has chosen to speak publicly for the first time about her relationship with…

The Snowy Clue That Revealed What Was Hidden Inside a Quiet Dutch Home

Snow was falling steadily over a peaceful Dutch neighborhood, blanketing every surface in a soft white layer. Within hours, cars, trees, and rooftops were coated in thick…

The Lunch Break Surprise That Reminds Us Why Produce Needs a Second Look

It happened during an ordinary lunch break—the kind where you toss a quick meal together without examining every ingredient. She sprinkled what she thought were quinoa grains…

Walking in Her Footsteps: The Quiet Legacy My Grandmother Left Behind

For most of my life, I believed my grandmother was simply frugal. She stayed home instead of going out to eat, wore the same shoes for years,…